Posted by: heisourstrongtower | November 5, 2012


“But the Holy Spirit produces this kind of fruit in our lives: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. There is no law against these things!”

I thought I would receive some answers while I was resting and relaxing this past week…but that isn’t how God decided to work on me.  It was upon my return from our trip that God spoke to me, in my own home, during the peace and quiet of my morning devotional time.  He used one word as the catalyst of my epiphany this morning…”empty.”  I have to be empty of what consumes me most, before God can fill me with what I need the most…the fruits of His Spirit.

I have been going backwards in so many ways lately.  I have been feeding my worry and my thoughts; both literally and figuratively, instead of feasting on God’s smorgasbord of love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and most importantly, for me right now, His self-control.

“’Don’t call me Naomi,’ she responded. ‘Instead, call me Mara, for the Almighty has made life very bitter for me. I went away full, but the Lord has brought me home empty.’” (Ruth 1:20-21, NLT)

This is the Bible verse that jumped out at me this morning and brought clarity, and direction to my life.  I have been feeling empty and bitter, lately.  I did not realize it until this morning, but I have actually been a bit mad at God.  I have been looking for “quick God fixes” of certain situations, so that I can feel His peace again and I realized this morning that maybe, the quick fix is not always the best idea and usually does not stick.

It obviously has not stuck with me…or why would I be right back to where I was a little over a year ago????  Well, not totally back to where I was then…I have made some imperfect progress; I am walking every day.  I just need to release the hold I have on that bowl of ice cream each night and remember that it only brings me a temporary satisfaction…not the lasting kind that can only come from holding onto God.

I have to push some things out of me…to allow God to fill me!  I have to push out the worry, sadness and despair that is weighing me down and start digesting, really digesting…His word.  I read and read and read, and the reading distracts me from dealing with what I need to deal with.  And, then I pray…but my prayers are mostly, “Please, Lord…do this, do that, change this person, change that situation.”

When in reality my prayers need to be “Lord, I know that You have the answer and You are the answer to every question or concern I have.  Change me, Lord.  Transform me!  Fill me, Lord!  Do a work in me, so that I am doing the work that You have planned for my life.  I don’t want to feel bitter and empty!  Lord, I want Your love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control to flow throughout my body.  I want to be filled with You and nothing else!!!!  In the name of Jesus, Amen.


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